2011-06-17

How we beat misery in Anniworld

1. Dancing
 In this context, by dancing I don't mean swaying sweaty in some night club, but doing actual choreographies. The more I have to focus on what I'm doing, the less my mind is engaged to thinking whatever it is that's bugging me. When I dance, nothing else matters. It's the only state, in which I don't need to care about anything but perfecting the movements and letting the music flow through me.
Of course doing any sport makes at least my body release a lot of those hormones (adrenaline, endorphins, dopamine) that result to a "runner's high" - a bliss-like feeling after exercise. Dancing, however, has one quality due to which, it easily overpowers everything else on my list: it requires persistent concentration from both body and mind. Yes, yoga has it too but for a mind like mine, it's way too peaceful. I need action to remove anger, sadness, anxiety or whatever.

2. Listening to Nightwish volume up really high
Actually I discovered this ingenuity only last night and was impressed by its effectiveness. At the moment, I'm home alone because my family is on the road, well in Los Angeles to be exact. I'm working and not too keen on travelling with them anyway, so I didn't go. This fact has produced plenty of benefits, one of which that I can play music as loud as I please. I have quite a good pair of speakers plus a small bass amplifier and that set is able to make some noise. The thing with high volume is basically that it sort of forces me to just listen what I hear from the outside instead of listening the voices inside my head (and no, not that kind of voices).
The thing with Nightwish is, well first and foremost, the senselessly phenomenal quality of everything, obviously. What really makes especially Nightwish the best option for this purpose, is that it's my thing. I mean there are quite a variety of artists/bands I love and many of them I listen more often than NW, but mostly all of those other alternatives are strongly connected to something and/or someone in my head, and if that something/-one is a part of my feeling down, choosing to listen to them will only make matters worse.
I'm not saying that I'm not touched by Nightwishes music for I am, but it's just so big and fantastic and earth-moving that I find it relatively simple to get completely absorbed by it.
It's my thing and not emotionally linked to any other person or thing that could possibly bother me.

3. Going to movies
I don't use this one often since the tickets are so expensive. What's important in this one, is the going-part. I can watch movies at home and not pay anything, but it rarely works if I'm really depressed. When sitting in a movie theatre I can pretend to be disconnected to the outside world and thus, to my problems. Also, there are no distractions in a theatre, which is great because for me the main idea behind all of these angst-removal methods is to get my mind focus on something with such comprehensiveness that no space is left for wallowing in self-pity.

4. Talking to someone reasonable
I have sort of promised to call this one person if it seems I'm ending up ripping my hair out in my relationship. I do not often follow this instruction, though. Stupid maybe, since I was told to pick up the phone no matter what the time was.
Anyway, talking to anyone sensible helps. Sometimes I'm just too embarrassed to admit what's on my chest and then I don't talk to anyone but myself, which has never proved to be helpful at all.
But yes, people, friends are important.
Unless it's them who are causing the angst. Then I go and dance.

5. Cleaning maniacally
I need a specific kind of mood in getting myself to clean the house, and it doesn't work if things are bad and thinking hurts. For a lighter angst or anxiety this works fine. When hoovering, doing dishes or dusting down I can still think about unpleasant stuff, but I can sort of relax when I'm doing something at the same time. I do remember cleaning with tear running down my face, though so this one's really just for a light-angst.


6. Eating a box of grapes and drinking Mata Hari tea while covered in blankets
This is for the last stage of a burst of angsty emotions. When I've cried too much to cry any more and thought too much to find even a hint of the common thread the best way to get at least a little bit higher spirit is to find it through comfort. Last winter I remember consuming probably unhealthy amounts of grapes and that specific tea. Biologically thinking the grapes' high glucose content raises blood sugar and affects on the brain's serotonin level, which both make people feel better. Mata Hari tea, on its part contains chocolate among other things and don't we all know that chocolate is a cure for everything.

I hereby swear that each and every one of the methods listed above have been properly experimented and proved to have induced positive results in the test subject.

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